Wednesday, 22 May 2013

Rebecca's Lost Journals: HIS SUBMISSIVE

Pages: 52
Date: 19/05/2013
Grade: 4.5
Details: Rebecca’s Lost Journals no. 3
Own / Kindle

The blurb:

“In part three of Rebecca’s Lost Journals, His Submissive , Rebecca must decide just how far she will go for the darkly intense man who she is falling in love with. And does she dare believe that he too, will ever love her?”

Most of my reviews contain almost exclusively my thoughts on a certain book. Occasionally, when a certain sentence is very descriptive of the story or my thoughts, I may quote from the story. For this book I’m going to make an exception. I will be using quotes from this novella as the basis for my review. My thoughts will be draped around the quotes so to speak.

When this third installment of the Lost Journals starts, Rebecca appears to have made up her mind. Yes, she does want what her Master has to offer, she feels ready to sign the contract and wear his ring. When she sends him proof of her decision, her Master’s reaction is not what she expects at all though. Rather than delight at her willingness to submit, she is confronted with anger; Master is not impressed with her making this decision based on so little knowledge of what she is actually agreeing to.

“I’ll teach you what each point in the contract means. Then we will negotiate the final terms. But know this. When you put that ring back on, there will be no holding back for either of us.”

And that is exactly what happens, starting with punishment for her rash and unsanctioned decision. As a result, Rebecca once again finds herself questioning her attraction to this man, which is undeniable:

“There’s this subtle energy that seems to crackle in the air, and I know I’m not the only person who feels it.”

But, while her lack of control when it comes to Him worries Rebecca, she can’t deny the satisfaction she finds at his hands:

“I will push you to your limit, Rebecca, but I will always leave you thoroughly pleasured.”

On the other hand, as Rebecca writes in her journal:

“I want to know all parts of me. I have to know myself to control my life and destiny. But does that mean “he” is the right man to help me make that journey?”

This certainly is a good question and from what I’ve seen of Him in the Journals so far, I can’t say I’m convinced this man is what Rebecca needs. However, because we only see him through Rebecca’s eyes and journal entries it is quite likely that we are not given an objective description of Him. And, to his credit, He does appear to go out of his way to explain his demands and actions to his apprentice sub

“A choice to hand over control under agreed upon terms is not only control itself, but the freedom to let go and escape reality when you otherwise wouldn’t.”

And He makes a point of taking her out of her comfort zone, because pushing Rebecca’s limits will be a huge part of their relationship:

“It bothered me to be shared, and yet it aroused me. I knew then that I had completely lost control of myself.”

Rebecca’s doubts about this aspect of the deal she is about to make lessens as her Master gives her an explanation that makes it clear to her that ultimately all his demands and decisions have a purpose:

“When he’s fucking you, and touching you, and licking you Rebecca, I can watch every little nuance of how it affects you. It’s like a window into your pleasure (...)”

It takes a lot of soul searching but in the end Rebecca comes to the conclusion that no matter what her reservations, and regardless of her doubts and fears there is only one logical outcome to her dilemma:

“Yes in that bed, I knew him as master more than I ever had, and I understood the escape that came from giving him that control, and the pleasure he promised would come with it.”

I like what Lisa Renee Jones has been doing in these journals so far. She gives the reader a wonderful and believable insight into one woman’s journey into what is for her unchartered and frightening territory. Most, if not all, of us will have experienced situations in which the demands of our hearts seem to be in conflict with those of our mind. Watching Rebecca trying to find a balance between the two is proving to be a very enjoyable journey.

This book is part of the Inside Out Series and should be read after its prequels in the following order:
If I Were You
The Seduction
The Contract.

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